-Ha-Ha.

-We've been doing a lot of upper body work on Bart. Today let's pound his kidneys

-[On the movie "Naked Lunch"] I can think of at least two things wrong with that title!

-Check it out, a freezer geezer!

-In my dreams, I'm a Viking!

-Hey, that hurts. No wonder no one came to my birthday party.

-The thing about huckleberries is that once you've had fresh, you never go back to canned