-I'm going to enjoy devouring you, Bart Simpson. Yes ... I believe I'll start, as you've so often suggested, by eating your shorts!

-I have caught word that a child is using his imagination and I've come to put a stop to it.

-Order, order. Do you kids wanna be like the real UN or do you just wanna squabble and waste time?

-That's two independent thought alarms in one day. Willie, the children are over-stimulated. Remove all the coloured chalk from the classrooms.

-Children, I couldn't help monitoring you conversation. There's no mystery about Willie. Why, he simply disappeared. Now, let's have no more curiosity about this bizarre cover-up.

-There's no justice like angry-mob justice.

-Hello, Simpson. I'm riding the bus today because Mother hid my car keys to punish me for talking to a woman on the phone. She was right to do it.

-I've always admired car owners and I hope to be one myself as soon as I finish paying off mother. She insists I pay her retroactively for the food I ate as a child.

-That's why I love elementary school, Edna. The children believe anything you tell them.

-Oh come on Edna, we both know these children have no future!